Dealing With Bullies at Work
2 minute read
If you asked me to recall encounters with workplace bullies, I could easily list them by name. Though I don’t allow them to live rent free in my head, rest assured they live in a metaphorical Burn Book for safekeeping. Working with a bully is unfortunate, to say the least, and I’m here to offer some guidance on how to deal with this effectively at work.
Dealing with a workplace bully starts with not trying to understand their motivation. Their actions are a direct reflection of themselves and their own issues, it is not a reflection of you. While it’s natural to take their words or actions personally and let them ruin your day, it is not worth it. After reminding yourself that their behavior is not a reflection of your personal worth, step back and consider your next moves:
Set Boundaries: Calmly but firmly inform the bully that you are unwilling to participate in this type of behavior and suggest resuming the conversation when it’s more productive. If this feels uncomfortable, simply disengage as quickly as possible - mute the chat, archive the email, or find an excuse to leave the room. You can address the bully later, when things aren’t so heated.
Document the Behavior: Keep a record of specific incidents, including dates, times, what happened, and any witnesses. If needed, these notes will be crucial for HR or management.
Seek Support: Talk to your Supervisor, HR, or another trusted leader in your organization. Having support can validate your experience and provide perspective. When talking to your trusted support person, be clear whether you are asking for guidance or if you are asking them to take action.
Use Proper Channels: If the behavior persists or escalates, file a formal complaint with HR. Your company likely has policies to address workplace bullying, and HR can guide you through the process.
Stay Professional: Maintain professionalism, and don’t engage in the bully’s behavior. Whatever you do, do not stoop to their level! .
If you are a leader, you have an additional layer of responsibility on how you deal with bullies in the workplace. As you are considering your next move, think about how the interactions with this bully affect your team’s culture and wellbeing, not just your own.
If you have raised these concerns to the appropriate individuals and are not seeing any improvement, this is your big red flag to find a new job. You deserve to be safe, valued and respected at work - full stop.
If you are dealing with a bully at work and need help thinking it through, let us know!
